Wednesday 12th January
So I have had very, very short, sparsely populated hair for a couple of weeks now. As I said previously Hannah had shaved off what was left of my hair using a number 3, so it is about half an inch long. This means that what now falls out is less noticeable and hopefully I won't have to shave it all off, but we shall see.
From my point of view nothing has changed. My head doesn't feel any different really. Occasionally I feel a little draughty around the back of my neck but that's about it. I am even getting used to seeing my altered reflection in the mirror.
Advantages of having no hair:
I never have a bad hair day.
The well know messy bed hair gorilla has stopped visiting.
It takes nano-seconds to dry my "hair".
I take even less time in the shower.
Wearing hats does not result in "hat hair".
Reduction in the amount of shampoo and conditioner used, obviously.
Disadvantages of having no hair:
None that I can think of, currently.
However, I am reliably informed by my brother (whom I now resemble) that banging your head hurts a lot more without the padding of hair and obviously sun burn is a risk, although not in the weather we're having at the moment!
So apart from wearing a woolly hat to keep my head warm when I go out I do not wear scarves, wigs or anything else to cover up my baldness.
Thus I have come to the conclusion that I possibly the least vain person I know as I am supremely unbothered by my current lack of hair. This may be because I am fairly certain that this is a temporary state of affairs. Or perhaps I am the vainest person I know as the thought of wearing a wig just fills me with despair.
Either way I came to the conclusion very quickly that when I am out and about wearing a woolly hat is easier as when my head gets too hot (which it does quite quickly, especially when entering overheated shops) taking off my hat is slightly less startling to those around me that whipping off a wig, which is infinitely more uncomfortable and hotter than my woolly hat.
Wednesday, 12 January 2011
Sunday, 9 January 2011
Well That's My Theory Down The Pan...Literally!
Sunday 9th January
My last chemo was on Friday 31st December. They had to use a new vein as my previous one has completely given up the ghost. I do wonder where the blood goes when a vein collapses. Answers on a postcard.
Anyway, I had assumed that since I had not thrown up previously that the cold cap was responsible for my nausea and sickness. How wrong I was! I threw up more this time than all the previous sessions put together and in fact generally felt much worse. Indeed as you will appreciate throwing up for the umpteenth time meant that I was throwing up on an empty stomach which is really the most awful thing ever. Added to this was the fact that any anti-emetics I had taken were chucked up as well before they had any chance to take effect, which probably made things even worse.
I can only attribute this to the following factors. Firstly I don't think I drank nearly as much water as previously and indeed Terry did comment on this after the event! Secondly, I usually have my chemo on a Wednesday so on Thursday and Friday I am alone all day and can, if not actually sleep, completely "zone out" as there is no one in the house to disturb me. This time however my two days after chemo were the weekend and although I did spend most of my time in bed the fact that there were people in the house, albeit quite quiet, I do not feel that I rested as much as I usually do. Thirdly I was getting over a cold and the effects of chemo might be cumulative, which doesn't bode well for the next two!
In general I have felt much more tired this time and I suspect this is entirely down to the lack sleep/rest in the immediate aftermath of the chemo.
Fortunately my next chemo is scheduled for Wednesday 26th January so hopefully all the above "problems" will be obviated.
The light at the end of the tunnel is nearly visible although Wednesday 16th February seems a long way off at times.
My last chemo was on Friday 31st December. They had to use a new vein as my previous one has completely given up the ghost. I do wonder where the blood goes when a vein collapses. Answers on a postcard.
Anyway, I had assumed that since I had not thrown up previously that the cold cap was responsible for my nausea and sickness. How wrong I was! I threw up more this time than all the previous sessions put together and in fact generally felt much worse. Indeed as you will appreciate throwing up for the umpteenth time meant that I was throwing up on an empty stomach which is really the most awful thing ever. Added to this was the fact that any anti-emetics I had taken were chucked up as well before they had any chance to take effect, which probably made things even worse.
I can only attribute this to the following factors. Firstly I don't think I drank nearly as much water as previously and indeed Terry did comment on this after the event! Secondly, I usually have my chemo on a Wednesday so on Thursday and Friday I am alone all day and can, if not actually sleep, completely "zone out" as there is no one in the house to disturb me. This time however my two days after chemo were the weekend and although I did spend most of my time in bed the fact that there were people in the house, albeit quite quiet, I do not feel that I rested as much as I usually do. Thirdly I was getting over a cold and the effects of chemo might be cumulative, which doesn't bode well for the next two!
In general I have felt much more tired this time and I suspect this is entirely down to the lack sleep/rest in the immediate aftermath of the chemo.
Fortunately my next chemo is scheduled for Wednesday 26th January so hopefully all the above "problems" will be obviated.
The light at the end of the tunnel is nearly visible although Wednesday 16th February seems a long way off at times.
Thursday, 30 December 2010
Hair today...
Thursday 30th December
They say that you will lose your hair when you have chemotherapy. This would indicate that I have no idea where my hair is. On the contrary, I know exactly where my hair is. It's on my pillow, it's in the shower plughole, it's on everyone I hug, it's on my scarf, it's on the collar and shoulders of all jackets and jumpers and in a supreme act of revenge, it's on the cats!!!
So given that I was starting to resemble scrofulous degenerate I decided to shave my head. Or rather let Hannah do it. So I had a number 3, (those of a male persuasion will be more familiar with this term). Anyway, I am fairly certain that Hannah will never be a hairdresser because at no point did she ask me how my Christmas was or where I'm going for my holidays! I am assuming that the rest of my hair will eventually fall out and then at that point I shall let my delightful husband, Terry, have a go at it with his razor.
I have decided that I will not be wearing a wig, as my head gets very hot when I wear a hat, which I can at least remove without too much fuss. I suspect that taking off a wig in public will probably cause more of a stir.
On the whole I've already got used to my "egg head", although I really do now look like my big brother, which is slightly disquieting. I shall just have to invest in some Bet Lynch style earrings so people can tell us apart.
They say that you will lose your hair when you have chemotherapy. This would indicate that I have no idea where my hair is. On the contrary, I know exactly where my hair is. It's on my pillow, it's in the shower plughole, it's on everyone I hug, it's on my scarf, it's on the collar and shoulders of all jackets and jumpers and in a supreme act of revenge, it's on the cats!!!
So given that I was starting to resemble scrofulous degenerate I decided to shave my head. Or rather let Hannah do it. So I had a number 3, (those of a male persuasion will be more familiar with this term). Anyway, I am fairly certain that Hannah will never be a hairdresser because at no point did she ask me how my Christmas was or where I'm going for my holidays! I am assuming that the rest of my hair will eventually fall out and then at that point I shall let my delightful husband, Terry, have a go at it with his razor.
I have decided that I will not be wearing a wig, as my head gets very hot when I wear a hat, which I can at least remove without too much fuss. I suspect that taking off a wig in public will probably cause more of a stir.
On the whole I've already got used to my "egg head", although I really do now look like my big brother, which is slightly disquieting. I shall just have to invest in some Bet Lynch style earrings so people can tell us apart.
Thursday, 23 December 2010
Every Cloud...
Thursday 23rd December
Fascinating Fact Number 1
One of the numerous side effects of my chemo is that all of my mucous membranes are particularly not "mucousy". This means that before I even open my eyes in the morning I have to roll my eyeballs around so that they are a bit more lubricated so that when I do open my eyes it doesn't hurt. I also have to do roughly the same with my mouth as my gums are stuck to my teeth and my tongue is stuck to the roof of my mouth.
Fascinating Fact Number 2
The snot produced when you have a cold is a result of your immune system trying to rid itself of the cold virus. The more snot produced the more vigorous your immune system.
Fascinating Fact Number 3
I have little or no immune system. I currently have a cold. However, as a direct result of the above two fascinating facts I am not in the least bit snotty. I do however have a very dry cough but have not had to blow my nose once. So although I feel quite rough I can at the very least breathe easily and am not keeping Kleenex in business!
Who knew that having a cold with no immune system would actually be better than having a cold with a fantastic immune system?
Fascinating Fact Number 1
One of the numerous side effects of my chemo is that all of my mucous membranes are particularly not "mucousy". This means that before I even open my eyes in the morning I have to roll my eyeballs around so that they are a bit more lubricated so that when I do open my eyes it doesn't hurt. I also have to do roughly the same with my mouth as my gums are stuck to my teeth and my tongue is stuck to the roof of my mouth.
Fascinating Fact Number 2
The snot produced when you have a cold is a result of your immune system trying to rid itself of the cold virus. The more snot produced the more vigorous your immune system.
Fascinating Fact Number 3
I have little or no immune system. I currently have a cold. However, as a direct result of the above two fascinating facts I am not in the least bit snotty. I do however have a very dry cough but have not had to blow my nose once. So although I feel quite rough I can at the very least breathe easily and am not keeping Kleenex in business!
Who knew that having a cold with no immune system would actually be better than having a cold with a fantastic immune system?
Wednesday, 22 December 2010
Cold...
Wednesday 22nd December
Well no chemo for me today. I have been coughing and spluttering since yesterday.
I called the chemo department and they told me that not only do I have a cold but my neutrophils are low again, probably as a result of my cold.
I have to keep an eye on my temperature, 35C degrees or below or 37.5C degrees or above and it's off to A & E for me.
So I will be having chemo on New Year's Eve instead!!! Consequently I shall definitely not be seeing in the New Year as I will be fast asleep. Hey Ho!
Still at least I can enjoy Christmas with my nearest and dearest.
Well no chemo for me today. I have been coughing and spluttering since yesterday.
I called the chemo department and they told me that not only do I have a cold but my neutrophils are low again, probably as a result of my cold.
I have to keep an eye on my temperature, 35C degrees or below or 37.5C degrees or above and it's off to A & E for me.
So I will be having chemo on New Year's Eve instead!!! Consequently I shall definitely not be seeing in the New Year as I will be fast asleep. Hey Ho!
Still at least I can enjoy Christmas with my nearest and dearest.
Saturday, 18 December 2010
Side Effects and Stasis
Saturday 18th December
You will note that it's been nearly three weeks since my last update, this is because life is pretty much normal and repetitive, in a three kind of way!
Most of my side effects are to be honest irritating rather than debilitating.
Obviously my hair is falling out and although I have a distinct lack of body hair (my armpits are as smooth as the proverbial baby's bottom), the hair on my head is just getting thinner and thinner. If it stays like this I shall consider that I have got off very lightly. Mind you given the current Arctic weather, wearing a hat is actually a necessity to avoid complete brain freeze.
The most irksome of the side effects is the cardboard mouth, as I like to call it. Basically, everything I eat during the middle week of the 3 week cycle, tastes and feels like cardboard. Moreover this sensation remains even when I am not eating. A curious result of this is that I seem to want to eat more and more. I think that this is because whilst I am actually eating the taste and flavour of the food is "correct" but the moment I have swallowed what is in my mouth, the cardboard sensation returns with a vengeance.
Another, slightly more painfully side effect is the skin on the tips of my fingers and the soles of my feet has become very hard and consequently cracks and then bleeds, which is, at times, excruciatingly painful and feels like I am walking on needles. However, Hannah has attended to my feet and lavished huge quantities of cream and kindness upon them and this seems to be doing the trick. Sadly my fingers are still suffering and I think this is because I am constantly washing my hands and can't always put hand cream on.
With regard to stasis, I find I am constantly saying "I'll do that when I have finished my chemo". Although, clearly I am getting on with things, I find that a lot of stuff I am putting off until then. Mainly because trying to fit things in to the 3 week schedule, when one week I am knackered and one week I am infectable does tend to reduce the window of opportunity somewhat.
Still, come the middle of February I shall be the original gadabout and social butterfly.
You will note that it's been nearly three weeks since my last update, this is because life is pretty much normal and repetitive, in a three kind of way!
Most of my side effects are to be honest irritating rather than debilitating.
Obviously my hair is falling out and although I have a distinct lack of body hair (my armpits are as smooth as the proverbial baby's bottom), the hair on my head is just getting thinner and thinner. If it stays like this I shall consider that I have got off very lightly. Mind you given the current Arctic weather, wearing a hat is actually a necessity to avoid complete brain freeze.
The most irksome of the side effects is the cardboard mouth, as I like to call it. Basically, everything I eat during the middle week of the 3 week cycle, tastes and feels like cardboard. Moreover this sensation remains even when I am not eating. A curious result of this is that I seem to want to eat more and more. I think that this is because whilst I am actually eating the taste and flavour of the food is "correct" but the moment I have swallowed what is in my mouth, the cardboard sensation returns with a vengeance.
Another, slightly more painfully side effect is the skin on the tips of my fingers and the soles of my feet has become very hard and consequently cracks and then bleeds, which is, at times, excruciatingly painful and feels like I am walking on needles. However, Hannah has attended to my feet and lavished huge quantities of cream and kindness upon them and this seems to be doing the trick. Sadly my fingers are still suffering and I think this is because I am constantly washing my hands and can't always put hand cream on.
With regard to stasis, I find I am constantly saying "I'll do that when I have finished my chemo". Although, clearly I am getting on with things, I find that a lot of stuff I am putting off until then. Mainly because trying to fit things in to the 3 week schedule, when one week I am knackered and one week I am infectable does tend to reduce the window of opportunity somewhat.
Still, come the middle of February I shall be the original gadabout and social butterfly.
Friday, 3 December 2010
Half Way There!
Wednesday 1st December
This must be the first time that I felt worse going in than coming out!
My appointment was at mid-day and I developed a really grotty headache during the morning. It was also freezing cold, so I felt extremely sorry for myself as I went in.
Fortunately my neutrophils were up to 5.14 so the chemotherapy went ahead.
I did not, however, use the cold cap. I was cold enough already. My hair is really quite thin and I suspect I would have had to be treated for hypothermia if I had gone ahead with it.
The department was quite cold due to the freezing weather so fan heaters were drafted in from all over the place. So by the time I was half way through I was getting quite warm, especially as I had the heat pad on my arm as well.
Just as I was finishing the hospital suffered a power cut. No doubt caused by all and sundry plugging in every heater they could lay their hands on. Now much of a problem for the chemotherapy unit, but I suspect a bit of bind for those in the operating theatres and the ICU! Fortunately the power was back on fully within about 10 minutes.
The after effects were much less than previously. I was quite tired and went to bed at 7pm but I have not thrown up - hooray! So I suspect that the after effects of the cold cap may be more than just reducing hair loss.
I am considerably less tired than before. Using my trek to the paper shop as my tiredness barometer and given the weather is less than clement, I feel pretty good although very cold. Mind you I'm probably not the only one!!!
This must be the first time that I felt worse going in than coming out!
My appointment was at mid-day and I developed a really grotty headache during the morning. It was also freezing cold, so I felt extremely sorry for myself as I went in.
Fortunately my neutrophils were up to 5.14 so the chemotherapy went ahead.
I did not, however, use the cold cap. I was cold enough already. My hair is really quite thin and I suspect I would have had to be treated for hypothermia if I had gone ahead with it.
The department was quite cold due to the freezing weather so fan heaters were drafted in from all over the place. So by the time I was half way through I was getting quite warm, especially as I had the heat pad on my arm as well.
Just as I was finishing the hospital suffered a power cut. No doubt caused by all and sundry plugging in every heater they could lay their hands on. Now much of a problem for the chemotherapy unit, but I suspect a bit of bind for those in the operating theatres and the ICU! Fortunately the power was back on fully within about 10 minutes.
The after effects were much less than previously. I was quite tired and went to bed at 7pm but I have not thrown up - hooray! So I suspect that the after effects of the cold cap may be more than just reducing hair loss.
I am considerably less tired than before. Using my trek to the paper shop as my tiredness barometer and given the weather is less than clement, I feel pretty good although very cold. Mind you I'm probably not the only one!!!
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