The erratic nature of the side effects of cancer treatment is very frustrating. I decided that this time round, as well as having the infusion over an hour rather than 30 minutes, I would take the 5 or so days after treatment, very, very easy. About 3 days after treatment I actually felt quite well and ate very well. 4 days after I felt nauseous and threw up, or rather possetted, barely a tablespoon. For the next few days I felt constantly un-hungry and slightly nauseous with the strange possetting. I did manage to eat 3 "meals" a day. As the week progressed I felt no better. I was due to go out for dinner with some old school friends on the Friday (8 days after treatment) and I was fairly convinced that although I would go, I would probably not have anything to eat. I'm such a cheap date.
Friday dawned and I had breakfast (which I have rarely if ever had a problem eating) and then just before lunch time, it was as if a switch went on and I was ravenous. I cooked my lunch, which was no mean feat as it required standing up for quite a while. That evening I had a very lovely 3 course meal with much reminiscing. The following day I could barely finish my lunch and on Sunday I ate very little in the way of lunch or supper.
The general feeling of grottiness continued for the next few days together with the usual overwhelming fatigue and as I write this (two weeks after treatment) I feel really quite good. My appetite is as normal as it's likely to be and my fatigue is not too bad. However, I am fully aware that tomorrow might be completely different.
This unpredictability makes living really rather problematical. Whilst I felt OK last Friday, (day 8), it doesn't necessarily mean that 8 days after my next treatment I'll feel OK. As you can appreciate this means that making any sort of plan for a social life very difficult. I guess that's probably what they mean by living your life one day at a time.
It seems that I spend a lot of my time on this blog moaning about my lot. Which is not really my intention. I like to think that I am more commenting on the delights of cancer and its treatment.
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